The Shortest Campaign Ever

I gotta hand it to Joe Biden. I would have never dreamed he'd be able to usher in his 2008 Presidential campaign with a more embarrassing gaffe than that which introduced national audiences to Biden 20 years ago. In the introductory stages of his 1988 campaign for the Presidency, Biden plagiarized the life story of British Labor Party leader Neil Kinnock and attempted to pass it off as his own at a campaign stump speech. Unfortunately for Biden, he was exposed as a fraud by those PR wizards working on the Michael Dukakis campaign. Biden quickly abandoned the race and it has taken nearly two decades before he has regained the nerve to give it another whirl.

And let's just say Biden didn't disappoint in his reintroduction of himself to American voters. He let loose a series of ad hominem attacks against his likely Democratic rivals, but it was actually his "praise" of Illinois Senator Barack Obama that will most be remembered from Biden's diatribe, referring to Obama as "the first mainstream African American [presidential candidate] who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy. I mean, that's a storybook, man."

Yikes! It's starting to become more clear why Biden was boasting about his home state of Delaware being a "slave state" last year when asked how he planned to appeal to voters in the South.

My only question now is how Biden possibly plans to outdo this starting gate fumble in his inevitable doomed 2012 campaign? Will he make the announcement at a press conference standing next to his teenage male "mistress"?